How To Be Single: Women And The Art Of Being Happily Alone



  Created By Trisha Mukherjee

They may have loved once, but the love wore off. Their idea of love and what they look for in a partner, too, changed. As independent women, they are now more aware — of what they want, of who they want.
After a whirlwind romance, Sangeeta Das decided to finally settle down with the love of her life at the age of 35. Married life was bliss. In some ways, nothing had changed. Her husband, a biker, would take her on long adventurous rides. They would explore new places and experiences together. In fact, their honeymoon was a bike ride from Delhi to Goa. Married life, in many ways, was just an extension of a blissful romance. Until it wasn’t. The early sign of its approaching end manifested in bickering and disagreements. The final nail in the coffin of their relationship was their disagreement over whether they wanted to have children. Sangeeta did. Her husband didn’t. So, a decade and a half later, the couple decided to call it quits and separated. While their divorce was in the process, her husband fell ill, and eventually passed away.

At almost 50, Sangeeta was single. While the circumstances that led to this were unfortunate, what came after was a sense of relief, freedom, and a refined idea of love. “Our love wasn’t a love which did not have trouble or a love that was unconditional. The fact that our marriage came to an end or that we decided to part ways was because there were situations where we couldn’t live under the same roof. We did love each other as human beings, but despite the love, we realised that our paths were different, our dreams and goals were different… our levels of understanding values, morals, principles were different. Our ideas of family and personal space were different. So, I had to decide whether I wanted to live with him and hate him, or live away from him and continue to love him. We decided to take a break, but we never expected that the break would start feeling so easy for us. We started enjoying that break too much, and we did not want to get back together anymore. That is when I realised that it was not sinful or shameful to admit that one’s love can die,” she says.

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